I'd like to thank myself, of course, and all the little people...

So i went to Ralphs the other day and this poor unfortunate soul asked if he could wash my windows. I only had a 10 on me so I politely declined (no!) and went about my business. My heart softened a little in the bread isle so I went back outside and gave him my $10. I showed him to my car and went back inside.

While pushing my cart around I felt pretty good. More than good...proud. Then I started to feel like Mother Teresa, I'm just so full of good deeds and cheer. I could have bought cute tights/del taco with that money, but no, I'm selfless. Not to mention humble. By the time I reached the checkout I was patting myself on the back and thinking up my acceptance speech for the Nobel Peace Prize.

I sauntered out to my car and...my windows weren't washed! That bum took my money and ran.

And that is what you get for feeling like Mother Teresa.